Talking Aloud

There was a time when I had abandoned my Facebook account because the then Newsfeed page was dull and drab. I mean, what had I to do with people voicing their every action and move. Today, somehow I've found myself in the same shoes and I know what it means to post a status, photo or comment on social media.
While marketeers, sellers and promoters use this as a medium to achieve their goal, it is not Lord alone who knows the other powers of this seemingly simple thing!
We, especially girls, get some thrill out of posting a line: either to foretell or forgive, either to predict or preach, to acknowledge or announce.
This, I realized after my repeated change of WhatsApp statuses. You anticipate who's reading it, seeing it and if you're a thinking person you take the liberty to go that extra mile and even assume their reactions. I, for one, can build a whole cause and effect reaction in my mind, based on one status alone. Its funny what those restricted number of characters can do and the ruckus(or pleasure!) they can cause.

Whether or not this is right is another story but an honest acknowledgement is that, I do it. I spend hours to go through others' statuses and days to think up of a witty line for my own account! That's what it is, as sad as it sounds: A majority of us refrain from saying things on the face, and drop hints on statuses and change our profile pictures often to set start a roller coaster of emotions!

Taken for granted

I am a citizen of Kolkata, born and brought up here.I live in Kolkata,crib about it, complain, dislike and disregard it but at the same time, there are moments when I can't help but love it, appreciate it, rejoice its glory. Just about every verb in the dictionary can befit my city.

In the past 20 years of my life, I've always looked forward to the Durga Puja and enjoyed it. However, this year was an exception. There was no frenzy, no looking-forward-to feeling. If you asked me why I'd have a zillion answers, knowing fully well that none of them would be valid.
I heard the dhak, saw the pandal, worshipped the devi. Whether I resounded the dhak mentally, noticed the intricate work of the pandal, is another story. I worshiped the Goddess with all due respect, it is the enjoyment, the glee and the emotion associated which just went missing somehow.

And this I realized, when I complained to my mother today saying, "Mumma my legs hurt and I don't know why 'cuz I haven't really walked much!" She replied instantaneously, " You didn't see the Puja this year, so the Goddess is just leaving a reminder before she wishes us farewell!"

Wallet Worries

A few days into my month-long vacation from college classes and teaching classes, I'm still absorbing the calmness of it all. I wake up in the morning and laze until breakfast and thereafter too! 

I had an amazing revelation yesterday: about having to carry or not carry wallets. We, 20-something year olds enjoy the privilege of going out with our parents without having to carry our wallets on us. 

This thought was not purely monetary. It's the whole feeling of carrying a wallet when you're out with your friends or even out alone. If you're absolutely sure you won't need money to pay anywhere or anyone, there's a little clump of grey cell which will scream out in your head: "Carry it!". Then, once you're out you're scared you'll lose it ( at least I am!) I check my bag for my grey piece of leather every time I step off public transport. I check the contents of my wallet as often as I find myself sitting alone somewhere, without a crowd prying over me, because I am also scared that people will see the money I have and take it away!

The fear, checking and cross-checking  goes on in a continuous cycle until I get home.

But such is not the case, when we have our parents by our side. Not only is the fear gone but the whole purpose of carrying the wallet is lost. Even the thought of assisting them with loose change is not encouraging enough. Its just this care-free attitude which overpowers and takes charge and on and off I find myself walking up to my father saying, "Papa can you give me ten rupees, I want to buy chips." 

Do you feel the same? 

At 1:00 a.m

The people on the other side of the world are presently awaiting the day to end. The hectic Monday will end and allow them to return to their homes and relax for a few hours until the wee hours of Tuesday morning make their way again. On the contrary, here I am, sitting wide eyed before my laptop. (Even though I have Blogger of my phone!) It is just this compulsive desire to stay up until late. It's happened with me before and today, is one of those days again.

I get these bouts of not being adequately adult. A chief part of being an adult, according to me, is to be able to stay up until late at night: either having so much work to do that 24 hours seem to fall short, thus making you feel important; or having so much activity close at hand to kill time, that you find yourself multi-tasking even at odd hours. I'm not sure which category do I currently fall into. However, the bottom line is that, I am all of 21 years and I feel I am not adult 'enough'.

As I sat in a dull class today, I thought silently that I was living a boring life, going about the same routine everyday and falling asleep by 11:00 p.m like little school children.(Ok! Middle school children get a leverage until 11!) At that time I told myself, I will go home and watch the several episodes of Castle which I've so fondly collected. Evening came, and I came home. Post dinner I found myself well tucked into my blanket, with the phone in my hand.  Even though I haven't seen the face of Richard Castle, its past 1:00 a.m and I am wide awake.
And as I type this post, my eyes are giving in and screaming for mercy. So, I think I should sleep after all, a two hour extension is not bad for a start!

What keeps you awake?



P.S: I hope I don't regret this tomorrow morning!

A calorie filled future!

A recently developed habit of mine is to think of my future, when I'm left alone. Either when I'm walking home, or when I'm ready to sleep or when a boring class is on with a strict teacher who won't tolerate whispers: my mind takes the liberty to fast-forward into the future and take a sneek peak. I like to believe that this is what will happen. Even though, I've seen myself in different scenes for the same situation!
One of the scenes which played on my mind was, I was in a foreign land(It should be either Singapore or USA!) and I had a respectable job and more importantly a decent car.
As I was driving around from some friend's place to a TJ Maxx, I visualized myself sipping Coke from a can. For a Coke lover like me, this is a blissful day dream. I stepped out made my purchases at the store and as I approached my car again, I opened my trunk and pulled out another couple of cans that could last me until the next destination! The trunk of my car was loaded with crates of Coke cans and the back seat was stuffed with nachos & Doritos & cho-cho sticks!
The dream was more about food than about the office I worked in, the work I did or even the city in which I lived!
But that's the fun of dreaming, I guess!

Snuggling into my quilt for another dream, as the skies have been grateful today and blessed us with pleasant weather

Kudos to more Coke filled dreams!